Ten Reasons Why We Don't Watch The Super Bowl

We don't watch the Super Bowl.
We're not particularly interested. Never were.
Here's why:

1) The entire event is hopelessly over-hyped. In the end, it's dreadfully anti-climactic.

2) The game is never really very interesting. Except for a few years, astoundingly it hasn't been very competitive.*

3) The halftime show stinks.

4) The whole thing reeks of NFL worship. It's like one big commercial for the league.

5) Since Joe Namath and Troy Aikman, foortball players just haven't been that interesting or that classy.

6) It's a dirty game that's now replete with cheating.

7) The game usually begins too late and always lasts too long.

8) The whole thing is so over-produced that the actual meaning of the game -- its essence -- is totally lost.

9) Super Bowl parties are Pig Cities and the fans in the stands aren't much better.

10) January and February are boring and forgettable no matter how the game turns out.

Oh, and one more: You can now watch the commercials at your leisure online. So you don't have to tune in for them anymore.

*OK, so this year it actually was competitive and exciting. But all that meant was that you only had to watch a few minutes of it to catch the real excitement. And the decisive play was dumb. dumb. dumb!