Bagel Bastardization

I confess: I'm funny about bagels.
Most bagels are just too gooey in the center -- too doughy -- for me. So, I've taken to cutting the bagel in half and then clawing out much of the dense dough in the center of each half. I then roll the dough into a golf-ball size or smaller sphere and think how much better I am without that ball of spongy dough in my gut. I toss the sponge ball and then toast the bagel and dress it with "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter." I suppose bagel aficionados consider all this sacrilege.
I don't know how many calories I may be saving by digging out the dough or by using the fake butter. It's just that a whole bagel with all that dough is too much and yet half a bagel doesn't do it for me either.
Call me crazy but now the whole damned thing has become a morning ritual.