Tuesday, February 2, 2021

Regrets? . . . I've Had A Few, But Then Again . . .

Regrets, I've had a few

But then again, too few to mention

I did what I had to do

And saw it through without exemption

I planned each charted course

Each careful step along the byway . . . 

The lyrics are familiar to all of us.
And they do resonate, especially as you get older and have a chance to look back on your life. But, who among us can say that throughout our life we always managed to do it our way? It's a nice thought, theoretically. But, if you always, always did it your way, you may have lived a pretty lonely life. What's more, that's left you with no one else to blame but yourself, right?
Maybe that's why it's been reported that Sinatra didn't like the song and really didn't want to record it in the first place. But he did record it and it became a sort of anthem that he had to sing at every performance. 
Sinatra (in lyrics rewritten by Paul Anka from the original French version) never had to list his regrets. But it's a safe bet that as the years went on, he had more than a few. He gave up so much in pursuit of his career and the toll was significant: three failed marriages; long periods of separation from his children; no real sense of family life as many of us know it; missed opportunities; friendships abandoned and promises forgotten. Hey, life on the road ain't necessarily all it's cracked up to be. Plus, the more successful you get the more insatiable the audience becomes.
Our own lives and regrets may seem Lilliputian by comparison. But, hey "I've had a few . . "
  • For one, I wish I had taken more risks. I should have been more daring -- especially early on. For example, had I known I might  have invested in real estate.
  • Of course, I should have never voted for Jimmy Carter that first time in 1976. But thank goodness I joined millions of others and didn't make the same mistake in 1980, otherwise we might have never had the Reagan Era.
  • And, I wish I had asked more questions and listened more closely to those who "knew better" -- to the gray beards and the supposedly wiser ones among us.
  • In fact, I wish I had more mentors to guide me along the way. 
  • And I probably shouldn't have been so hasty, so quick to make up my mind and sometimes swift to judge.
  • Also, I should have asked for what I wanted more often, even if it seemed out of reach. The worst thing that can happen is that someone says "no" and that's not the end of the world, right? In fact, it may be just another beginning.
  • Then again, in some cases, I may have been too quick to show my cards. I should have been more discreet, I suppose -- kept my own counsel.
  • There were times I should have been more assertive; should have talked to people and engaged them instead of being cautious or even dismissive or just plain shy (yes, shy! -- if you can believe that). Was it all a matter of fear of rejection?
  • And I should have gotten out of my comfort zone more often.
  • Plus, maybe I should have traveled more, too. But I'm now making up for that.
Obviously, I never "planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway." I was never that calculating and I'm not sure I ever wanted to be. 
Finally, I probably should have been more responsive when Eileen Powell kissed me in the third grade cloak room. Was I caught off guard? Flummoxed? Oh, that's another story for another time . . .


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