Bill Gates - You’re smart, your rich and you’re a hopeless nerd and a pain in the ass.
Bob Iger - You helped to ‘eff the company up during your first go round. Now you should recognize that Disney is unfixable and quit.
Lea Thomas - You’re not a champ, you never were. In fact, you don’t even rise to the level of a chump. You’re a bellyflop.
The Kelces - Yes, the whole family: Pretty Boy Travis, Dad Bod Jason, Big Momma Donna and all the rest. And take Taylor Swift with you. You’re all overexposed.
Robert DeNiro - Trump was right — you’re washed up. In fact, you’re a foul mouthed, tin horn thug. Exit stage left.
Liz Cheney - You’re imperious, burdensome and disintegrating before our very eyes. It’s not a pretty sight.
Meghan and Harry - The saddest part is that there was once even a glimmer of hope for the two of you. Now? You’re just hopelessly irrelevant.
Alejandro Mayorkas - We have no idea what your intent was but obviously neither did you. We’d be overstating it if we called you incompetent. You’ve put us all at risk.
Antony Blinken and John Kerry - The both of you are insufferable, presumptuous snobs. You belong in the House of Lords.
Patrick Mahomes - Too many tantrums, too many meltdowns, too many messups -- all looking more and more like the beginning of the end. Get off the field, little boy!
Karine Jean-Pierre - From now on, no one with a hyphenated name will ever be taken seriously. Not only are you unable to answer questions but you look like a Cabbage Patch doll.
Jill Biden - Your taste is off-the-rack Walmart. Oh, sorry — we didn’t mean to insult Walmart like that.
Mitch McConnell - Your favorables are hovering at what, about one percent? Is there no one who will tell you that you're way past your expiration date?
Ben Affleck and JLo - We weren’t even interested the first time around. Or was it the second?
Greta Thunberg - OK, so now you’re 20 years old. Considering when you started, in media years that’s 87. Your time is up. Go away!
Bill Maher - You’ve managed to survive by posing as a sometimes conservative. But the act is hopelessly faux and lots of us see right through it.
Andrea Mitchell - OMG, are you still on the air? You’re an anachronism. Plus, you’re a former Penn trustee and have helped put that school in its current sorry state.
Ronna Romney McDaniel - You dropped the “Romney” part but we’ve added it back. Do you know why? It’s because you’ve failed!
John Legend and Chrissy Teigen - We can’t understand why anyone even cares about the two of you. You seriously need to get over yourselves.
Srephen Colbert - You think you’re oh-so-sophisticated, well-informed and witty. But the bottom line is you’re Just. Not. Funny. Go away!
Andy Cohen - It’s bad enough that you gave us the Kardashians. And then there were all those disgusting housewives. Face it, you trade in trash. Report to the nearest dumpster.
Claudine Gay - We don’t care if you're President of Harvard. You’re a plagiarist. Resign, and take the presidents of MIT, Cornell and most of the other snob schools with you.
Rashida Tlaib - You’re despicable. And yes, take along the entire squad as well. You trade in hate and you’ve sunk to a new low this year.
Jake Sullivan - For a geek you make way too many missteps and blunders. Bottom line: you’re clueless. It’s time to turn in your pocket protector.
Oh, one more thing: we felt we dare not add Pope Francis to the list, wondering if the wrath of God might come down upon us. But we didn't need to add him or even explain why we might add him. Instead, none other than Philadelphia Archbishop Emeritus Charles Chaput essentially added him for us. Read what the Archbishop has to say about the Pope here.
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