Eddie Murphy steps forward and he's intro'd as one of the top five highest grossing actors of all time. Now, a surprise: Best original screenplay goes to Birdman. Hmmm . . . this had pretty much been expected to go to Budapest. And Michael Keaton is still chewing that gum and he's chewing it with an open mouth - showing the gum. Bad form.
Oprah Winfrey is on now as a presenter and we're not going to say anything more than that.
The Imitation Game wins best adapted screenplay. This is as expected. Now, the recipient tells a scary and touching story about how he tried to kill himself when he was 16 years old because he was "weird and different" and here, once again we have a quasi-socio-political statement. But, he delivers a message of hope for others and thank God he didn't kill himself because he appears to be a fine talent who's already given us an Oscar-winning great script -- the first of many, we hope.
Now, that notorious liberal loudmouth Ben Afleck has stepped forward to present the best director award. He plays it straight and the award goes to the director of Birdman. No surprise.
The winner says "that little prick" and reveals that he is wearing Michael Keaton's "tightie whities" and that they (we think this is what he said) "smell like balls." OK. And he goes on and on.