Goodness knows (though goodness had nothing to do with it) there were more than enough jerks to go around.
Rudeness, crudeness, infidelity, boorishness, arrogance and the near epidemic flaunting of bad behavior all characterized the past year.
So, in no particular order, here are the Biggest Jerks of 2009.
Harry Reid - Jerk on a power trip, complete with wild allegations, lies, middle-of-the-night schemes, secret deals, the seizure of one-sixth of the US economy and the first Christmas Eve Senate vote in more than 100 years. It's hard to top this guy.
Tiger Woods - "Transgressions." Need we say more?
Barbara Boxer - Madame bitch slaps decorated Army brass who offers her nothing but respect and snaps: "Call me Senator!"
David Letterman - Dirty old man jerk tosses out sick, snide references to Palin's younger daughter, then tries to back away and then finally admits his own indiscretions with much younger staff members.
Professor Henry Louis Gates, Jr. - Pulls rank on a police officer who's simply trying to do his job, prompting Gates' friend, The President to trip up almost as badly as Gates himself. Kabooom!
Alan Grayson - Congressman says GOP want sick people to "die soon," compares health care system to the Holocaust, calls Cheney a "vampire" and refers to female federal reserve official as a "whore." Maybe the gentleman from Florida has spent too much time in the sun.
Kanye West - In this case "attention deficit disorder" means "I can't get enough attention and I will continue to make a fool of myself until you recognize me for the jerk I am."
Mark Sanford - Governor finds soul mate on the Applachian Trail or in South America or in South Carolina or in the rain forest of Brazil or in Argentina or in Panama or in Mexico or . . . awww, shutup!
Arlen Specter - Hypocritical jerk says he'll never leave the party and then, just days later, he does. Take that to the bank -- or the voting booth, Pennsylvania!
Al Franken and the People of Minnesota - Franken for his peevish, disgusting, repulsive behavior and the people of Minnesota for allowing the election to be swiped out from under them. Not since Jesse "The Body" Ventura . . .